During this first of what will probably be many waiting periods, you have been asking us some good questions about our home study. Once about 87 of you ask the same questions, we realize that it’s time to update our blog. (We love the questions, so keep them coming!)
What is a home study? I’ll let adoption.com give you their definition: The purpose of the home study is to help the court determine whether the adoptive parents are qualified to adopt a child, based on the criteria that have been established by state law. Basically, we need to fulfill a whole bunch of requirements before we become legally available for adoption. Each state has their own laws, so we will obviously need to follow the laws for the state of Pennsylvania.
What all is involved in a home study, and why does it take 3-5 months to complete? The home study is often referred to as “the paperwork pregnancy.” There is LOTS of paperwork! Here is a sampling of some of the things we need to complete in our home study process:
* References – Six references are completed and returned:
o Three from close friends
o One from each of our bosses (we happen to have the same boss :))
o One pastoral reference
* Three Interviews with Agency Staff – The agency likes to meet with us together and separately:
o A joint interview at the agency office
o Individual interviews at the agency office
o A joint interview in our home – This interview is NOT about making sure we keep house like Mary Poppins. :) It’s simply about making sure that we live in a clean, safe environment, and that we have room for a child.
* A Litany of Paperwork – They weren’t joking when they said “paperwork pregnancy.” Check out some of the other stuff we need to complete:
o State and Federal Clearances
o Medical Histories
o An updated will, including legal guardians for our new baby
o Marital Self Study – Sample questions include:
* When did you first start thinking about adoption and why?
* How would you describe yourself when you were a child?
* What do you admire about your spouse?
o Additional legal documents we won’t bore you with here…
* Required Reading – There are four books that Bethany requires each of their domestic infant families to read. Cool!
So you can imagine, after we’ve taken the time to set up appointments, fill out forms, meet with lawyers, case workers and financial consultants, 3-5 months will fill up pretty quickly.
What happens next after the home study? Once we have the final stamp of approval on our home study, we are ready for a placement. Every agency is different in how they handle placements. Here’s how Bethany does it:
1. Every adopting family completes a profile for birthparents. A profile is a scrapbook of pictures and information on who we are, what we believe, what we desire in our family. Birthparents will then get to view our profile later in the process.
2. A Bethany case worker has been meeting with a birthmother/parents for several months – sometimes less, sometimes more.
3. When that birthmother reaches her 6-7 months pregnant mark, and she is still voicing a desire to make an adoption plan for her baby, the case worker writes a “Situation Letter,” describing everything we are allowed to know about the birthmother, birthfather, and the baby himself. This non-identifying information will include:
* Age, health history, race, and other notable information on the birthmother
* Age, health history, race, and other notable information on the birthfather
* Known health, race, and gender of the child
* Desires for openness in adoption and ongoing relationship with us and the child throughout the child’s life
(SPECIAL NOTE: During the first 7 months of pregnancy, most expecting mothers will choose to parent vs. choosing to make an adoption plan.)
4. We receive the Situation Letter in an email, as do all of the other couples who have completed their domestic infant home study with Bethany.
5. We then read and pray through the Situation Letter and decide if we would like our profile to be shown to that birthmother.
6. The birthmother reviews the profiles of those of us who have given our permission, and she chooses 1-3 couples that she would like to meet in person.
7. After meeting us in person, she has a choice whether or not to continue her adoption plan with us. Is she says “yes,” then we have the opportunity to meet again before the baby arrives.
(SPECIAL NOTE: There are lots of details we are leaving out from this meeting. Maybe we can fill in more details in our next blog…)
8. The birthmother makes a hospital plan
a. Would she like us to be there for the birth?
b. Would she prefer we wait to arrive until later that day? The next day?
How long will you wait for a placement? Essentially what most of you have meant with this question is, “How long do you have to wait for a birthmother to choose you?” Now THAT is the question of the hour. WE HAVE NO IDEA!!! It could take one month, one year, even up to three years, which is how long our home study is “good” for. Most couples receive a placement within 18 months, but there is really no telling how long we will wait. It is all about God’s timing and placing His child into our family in just the right time.
THANK YOU! We hope this update has helped to answer some of your questions about our next 3-5 months. We love you guys! Thanks for reading all of this!
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